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Dating in the New Age

Recently, there has been an over indulgent saturation of motivational, “self help” books and articles geared toward the modern women’s inability to find love. Most of these books boast the same premise: they alone hold the Holy Grail to love, relationships and the inner workings to the complicated male mind. Apparently, the way to keep a man enthralled is not by being the beautiful, confident, independent, complicated species that we are. Rather, we are told to view men as prey, and with the aid of the author’s instructions we become predators able to predict their behavior so that we may ensnare them in a cleverly disguised trap. We then must strategically pounce at the first opportunity but unlike other predators, we are not allowed to simply devour our meal to contentment. Instead, we must suddenly become aloof and demure yet captivating enough to enchant these oblivious men into long term committed relationships.

Not only do these self proclaimed guru’s educate the naïve woman about how to capture the attention of a man, they apparently have become experts on how to get your dream man to commit and marry you, and if he ever decides he wants to leave one day, how to get him to come back to you. In 2009 a movie based around the popular book He’s Just Not That Into You followed the lives of several helpless women who were so desperate they were willing to do anything for love. While this movie was a gross exaggeration, it causes me to ponder if at least in some ways we as women are this hapless dating catastrophe obsessed with marriage.

If you think about it realistically, as young girls we have been taught that without a long term relationship to sustain us, our lives are meaningless. The message of commitment, marriage and family has been ingrained into us to the point that even the most successful achieved career woman is deemed as unhappy or unfulfilled without the relationship attachment.

Now don’t misconstrue my rant. I am not anti-love, anti-commitment or even anti-marriage. In fact in many ways I am a romantic. But, in this era, relationships are now partially comprised of single parents, same sex domestic partnerships, polyamorous and open relationships. Therefore, is it inconceivable to assume that as we as a civilization evolve and become a more advanced species, that the way we view love and traditional relationships should also evolve?

And if we as women evolve since we hold the power, will men not also evolve the way they view us?


When I think of auras, I imagine them as your very own fingerprint that you designed.

A fingerprint, so unique and amazing in which you are the master that if we look close enough we can each appreciate each other’s creations. Your aura is like a blinking billboard that basically says this is who you are based on your physical, spiritual and emotional health at this exact moment. Do you like what it says about you? Do you understand it? Do you even know what your aura colors are?

An aura is an energy vibration frequency that is so strong, it can be seen, recorded or photographed. It receives information from the body through the chakra system. All physical beings have auras and there are seven layers that make up an aura.

Layer One- Etheric Body connected with Root Chakra

This layer is the closest to the physical body and directly corresponds to health, physical well being, pleasure, pain, illness, and how active one is. It represents the muscles, tissues, bones and has a bluish grey color.

This layer is often the easiest seen by the naked eye. Generally speaking, you may see a haze of bluish gray, sparkles of gray or blue or even some tinting. It is also worth noting that this layer pulsates around 20 cycles per minute so you may also see a pulsating or vibration when looking at it. In an individual that is either ill, weak immune system or leading a sedentary lifestyle the aura may appear gray or weaker in color, whereas in athletes it will be stronger.

Layer Two- Emotional Layer connected with Solar Plexus Chakra

This second layer reflects emotions and feelings. Any color can be reflected from very bright and vibrant to dark or muddy. Stress or anxiety will be reflected not only here but if not resolved can eventually negatively impact layers one and layer two.

Layer Three- Mental Layer Sacral Chakra

This layer relates to the ego, thoughts and personal power. Typically bright yellow in color and you will often find around the head, neck and shoulders. Those who are concentrating on mental tasks, creative or imaginative typically have the brightest yellow colors here.

Layer Four- Astral Layer Heart Chakra

This layer relates to where we form our astral cords with others. It shows our ability for love and appears pink in color. It will become stronger through loving relationships and weaker during breakups or conflicts.

This layer is the door to the astral world. In the physical body, two individuals may avoid each other whereas in the astral state they may have conflict.

Layer Five- Etheric Template Throat Chakra

Blueprint of everything that is YOU

The layer like is a negative photograph template of etheric level one. Colors vary but knowing who you are will activate healing.

Layer Six – Celestial Third Eye Chakra

Connected to the third eye and reflects connection to the divine and other beings. Unconditional

love and ecstasy flows freely and will appear pearly white in color. This layer also reflects the relationship with God, the Creator, the Universe and Unconditional Love. It is extremely powerful in connecting us with our purpose in life.

You may also see the light reflected as double or multiple beams of gold-silver light but it is difficult to see.

Layer Seven-Ketheric Template Crown Chakra

This final layer is associated with divine and universal consciousness and contains all the information about your soul. It vibrates at the highest frequency. It is gold in color and rapidly pulsates. It is your link to the universe and your psychic abilities.






Yellows are joyful, sunny, happy and energetic individuals who are creative. Generally speaking,  they are very playful and have an easy going attitude toward most aspects of life feeling they never want to grow up. Often because of this, they may appear younger in appearance.

Most Yellows are well liked, the life of the party and social however they keep only a few close friends. However, yellows are extremely sensitive and can overload quickly because they have an “energetic antenna”. They make great partners for Blues


Blues are the care takers of all the personalities. Their purpose in life is to serve, help and love others. They tend to be introverted and emotional. Blues are concerned for others more than themselves and often pursue careers as therapists, nurses, social workers, healers and teachers. Additionally, blues are typically sensitive, nurturing, compassionate and adaptable to change.

Success for Blues is not measured by wealth but by finding fulfillment in their life’s purpose.  The best relationships for blues are peaceful and loving as they need loyal and monogamous partnerships to be happy.

Conversely because of Blues sensitive nature they are easily hurt, prone to self pity and may cry easily. Because they are always seeking harmony, they will almost always forgive and they are often taken advantage of. The most difficult challenge for Blues is saying NO because they have an innate fear of rejection or not receiving love.

Blues often absorb other people’s physical illnesses, depression or problems taking them on for themselves. Also, blues tend to not enjoy physical activity much and may gain weight easily if they are not careful. The best exercises for Blues is walking, water exercises  and bicycling and will often meditate, listen to soft music or live in a nurturing environment to recharge their battery.


Greens are the most balanced people in the aura spectrum. They enjoy nature and tend to be open, friendly and communicative. They love to talk about their feelings and thoughts, tend to spend time with a few close friends or family and can get bored easily if they are not physically active.

Besides Greens love of nature, they also have a love of animals and other people.

Greens tend to be irresponsible at times when it comes to spending money and may find it easier when someone else is supporting them. However, Greens tend to be very clever and analytical but may not act on ideas for themselves and actually wait for others to show up.


Red is a powerful color in the aura field and it can be seen either as a positive or negative element. It is the color of raw passionate energy. It is associated with power, success, competitiveness and willing to do anything to win.

Reds are also know for their eroticism sexually. Conversely it can also indicate a deep seated anger or temper.


Oranges are thrill seekers and adventurous living to achieve their own goals. They need to make things happen and to be in charge.

Generally Oranges are energetic, creative and seek their own pleasures in life. Because of this, they may put themselves in dangerous situations needing to continuously find the next bigger thrill.

Oranges don’t follow the rules in particular and could care less about communicating as they tend to be loners. Oranges are usually not interested in long term relationships or having a family. Because they tend to be physically fit and attractive, they tend to have no difficulty in finding lovers.

Many Oranges find short term career options that are not very safe such as stunt men and will use the money they make to invest in high risk activities.


Violets are considered visionaries, intuitive, creative and have a divine connection with the universe and connection with God.

They are able to see the bigger picture and perceive life through their “third eye”. They see God in everything that exists. Violets have a strong urge to support the community, nation and planet wanting to improve society.

They are leaders that tend to inspire others.

Food Day at the Office

In a few days the team in my office will continue its long standing monthly tradition of gorging themselves into a food induced stupor on over processed junk foods, sugar laced deserts and main dishes saturated with butter, cheese and salt with an obligatory salad.

The delightfully fat infused carb filled menu will be prepared by unknown hands in unbeknownst locations. It is feasible that some locations may contain kitchens full of mischievous fur balls known as cats, enthusiastic dogs with eager tongues, and unwashed roaming fingers of pesky children and other household pests that may tamper with otherwise edible food. Other locations the dishes are prepared in will undoubtedly be done so in filth by soiled utensils and hands, taste tested and blended all prior to our consumption at work.

As these splendid dishes are gloriously spread for your enjoyment, they are once again put through the gauntlet of scrutiny. They are poked, prodded, jabbed, sniffed, and sometimes picked through before it finally makes it way to your plate for your ravenous enjoyment.

Beneath the thick layers of sauces and dips blending harmoniously into a glorious obscene medley, is the carefully constructed dish. The food, is then greedily ingested until satisfaction.

After the frenzy ceases and the remaining remnants of food become scarce, you will see regretful coworkers shaking their heads in disdain as they hold their swollen bellies. The grumblings of overfed, underpaid office staff can be heard bellowing inside cramped bathroom stalls.

And why do we do this? Why does this tradition live on in American offices all across the country?

Who turns down free food…..

Scar Tissue

I had funny thought today about scar tissue. 

A year ago I had my gall bladder removed and have three thick circular black scars on my abdomen. They are about the size of a pencil eraser. I was examining them today and relax the scars were numb to feeling. 

As a test, I took a sharp knife running its edges over the scar, not to make it bleed but to see if my skin could feel prickles. It did not. So I pressed on it in several areas leaving indentations. Nothing. Then I pressed deep, not to hurt myself but out of curiousness. I didn’t even break the skin however applying pressure the skin beneath puckered scar felt pinched.  

The thought then occured to me how after a wound heals, the skin forms a protective thick layer incredibly hard to dissect. It perhaps does this during the healing process to protect the areas wounded. I can imagine if you were to perforate this scar tissue (only), the dead nerves would perceive no pain. 

This got me thinking about our hearts.  The place where our emotional hopes, dreams, desires, love and hate live. If we are caused enough emotional pain, do we instinctively grow scar tissue? I think so as we are all creatures who are here for self preservation and survival. How many times in a lifetime can ones heart break until this scar bonds with our emotions? More importantly, does that mean there is some deep emotional layer that when there is penetration the pain is not recognizable unless you get past the scar. Is love and heartbreak like that? To love a damaged person do you have to go deep enough to open those layers to find the “emotional” nerve. 


I loved being loved. I mean I literally love being loved. There is no better feeling than to be the center of his universe. Even for just a snapshot in time.

And I am not just some naive, disillusioned girl. I was the center of his universe because it was chaos and burning ashes all around him. He was surrounded by violence. And anger. And hate. And I …. I was like an unexpected summer breeze at night. Something gentle, and wonderful and something he didn’t know he needed until he had it.

And I was loved. I truly was. Smack dab center of his world. Nothing else mattered. He could only feel me. No one else was beautiful. He only saw me. He heard no other voice. He could only hear me.

My flaws weren’t flaws, they were battle wounds and God he loved each and every one of them.

And then the walls inside of him came down. Then the walls outside of him came down. He saw the world. It was fast. And busy. And colorful. And loud.

And then he discovered. He no longer loved me. And I am no longer loved. And I hate that.

The Accidental Heartbreak

I didn’t plan on falling for him. Hell I didn’t plan on falling in love. But I did. And it hurts. I’m surrounded by it. It is suffocating. Like all I know is this heartache. Unending, unwavering and relentless. The kind of hurt you feel when you don’t want to live or crawl out of bed. And I have to remember this feeling.  Especially on the good days. I don’t want to hold on to my heartache – it is so easy to try to relieve it. To settle in the lies. To placate the pain. But, that would only delay the inevitable.
I’m numb. It hurts so bad my body is numb except for my heart. My heart literally feels like he reached inside of my chest and squeezed my entire heart.
I’m so angry. and hurt. And confused. And broken..  again. Fuck I am so broken again.
Copy-written 2016

YOUTUBE Killed the Video Star

We are all familiar with the catchy Buggles 1979 hit Video Killed the Radio Star.

The lyrics:

In my mind and in my car, we can’t rewind we’ve gone too far

Pictures came and broke your heart

Put down the blame on VCR

Oh, you are a radio star

You are a radio star

Video killed the radio star

I happened to be enjoying my daily Youtube video binge when this treasure popped up on the home page. As I watched robotic monotone singers with expressionless faces in ridiculously new-age eccentric attire, swaying stiffly to techno inspired disco beats, I thought about all the videos I had consumed on Youtube.

I revel in music. But silly humans, Youtube isn’t just for music junkies like MTV, BET and VH1 used to be. Youtube has become the GOOGLE of internet videos. It is the search engine of all that is downloaded and digitized.

Missed an episode of your favorite show or want to check out next week’s previews: GO TO YOUTUBE

Want to find out where that hilarious meme originated your auntie’s cousin’s uncle’s girlfriend tagged you in on Facebook: GO TO YOUTUBE

And lets not forget the thousands upon thousands of content creators who do anything from reacting to other creators videos, “pranking” people, reviewing products, or just making vlogs about how amazing their life is or isn’t.

There is literally so many hidden gems on Youtube, in the 21st century it has become also impossible to keep even the most fervent music junkies monolithic.

Music isn’t dead, but just like in 1979, maybe the way we prefer to receive it is.